fucked.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
java peed on my pillow again this morning while i was in the shower. it took every ounce of strength that i had not to beat the ever loving shit out of him.
my only pair of pants have a gigantic hole in the ass, which, out of frustration, i wound up ripping in half. now i have no pants.
the wood floor of my apartment is so soaked and saturated with pee in some spots that it is impossible to get out and just keeps getting peed on.
i quit therapy yesterday, so now i don't have sandra any more (although, i've had less and less of her lately anyway).
i'm a huge disgusting fat sack of shit, and i can't manage to lose any of this weight, no matter what or how hard i try.
there is so much rage inside me that it feels like my head is going to explode.
i don't fucking buy that there is only one way out of this and that is to take a pill. i'm not taking the fucking medication. and if that is truly the only way out (and i don't think that it is, but that is the only solution that anyone will offer me), then i am going to die. plain and simple. and the sooner the better.
my only pair of pants have a gigantic hole in the ass, which, out of frustration, i wound up ripping in half. now i have no pants.
the wood floor of my apartment is so soaked and saturated with pee in some spots that it is impossible to get out and just keeps getting peed on.
i quit therapy yesterday, so now i don't have sandra any more (although, i've had less and less of her lately anyway).
i'm a huge disgusting fat sack of shit, and i can't manage to lose any of this weight, no matter what or how hard i try.
there is so much rage inside me that it feels like my head is going to explode.
i don't fucking buy that there is only one way out of this and that is to take a pill. i'm not taking the fucking medication. and if that is truly the only way out (and i don't think that it is, but that is the only solution that anyone will offer me), then i am going to die. plain and simple. and the sooner the better.
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